OBAMA TO ADDRESS JOINT SESSION OF CONGRESS

GOP plans to play speech backwards, see if it says "Paul is dead".

REPORT OF COUGAR CLOSES SEATTLE PARK

CLOSURE TO BE LIFTED TOMORROW EXCEPT FOR MEN UNDER 30 YEARS OF AGE. STORY

TOWN HALLS REVEAL COUNTRY HAVING HISSY FIT

COUNTRY HAS TANTRUM. ENTIRE NATION TO BE PUT ON A "TIME OUT", SENT TO THEIR ROOM.

NAKED RUMP RUMPUS PROVES SOUTHWEST AIRLINES SPACIOUS

NEWEST AD FOR AIRLINE? COMPETITORS RUSH TO TEST WRESTLING ROOM ON VARIOUS AIRCRAFT. STORY LINK

STUNNING OBAMA 'NATURAL BORN' NEWS!

Obama extended family recalls, verifies that his mother DID use the LaMaze method. (Creds to P.J. Matricardi)

WILLFUL IGNORANCE DISORDER TO BE COVERED UNDER NEW HEALTHCARE.

Recognizing the emerging malady, an amendment has been added to the Healthcare bill to include coverage of this disorder. Pre-existing conditions are covered.

TOWN HALL SCREAMERS ATTENDANCE STYMIED

Stunned by realization they have to drive there on "public streets". Built and maintained by government, the risk is just to great, they say.

RETIREES NOT SURE ABOUT TOWN HALL ATTENDANCE

Many conflicted; go and complain about the "public option", or stay home and see if their Medicare card comes today.

"TEA PARTY" SCREAMER FELLED BY HEART ATTACK AT TOWN HALL, SAVED BY LOCAL GOVERNMENT PARAMEDICS.

Boobs vs. Boobs

NEW WASHINGTON STATE LAW PROTECTS NURSING MOTHERS; EFFORTS TO BAN EXPOSED MAN BOOBS CONTINUE

Birthers new News

BIRTHERS REVEAL NEW DETAILS! OBAMA WAS NEVER BORN!!!!!